Such Joy!

We’re going to see Daddy!

It was January 1st, exactly 1 month since we’d seen him disappear into the crowd at Pearson International Airport in Toronto. During that month, Christmas had come and gone and I had a taste of what life would be like as a single parent. I piled our 3 little girls into our little Toyota hatchback then headed back down the highway to pick up my husband, Andrew, who was on the return flight from Uganda, Africa. We were SO excited! But then the traffic slowed. It was bumper to bumper. Then the cars ahead of me stopped altogether. My heart sank as the minutes dragged on and on. It was 1985- no cellphones, no internet. What would he be thinking if we weren’t there to greet him on time? A month is a long time without my husband and our girls were also missing their dad. One night during that month, 6 year old Sara came into our bedroom, just sobbing. When I asked her what was wrong she she choked out,

“I..I..I don’t remember what daddy looks like!”

My heart broke, so I took her hand, and together, we walked downstairs to the piano covered with photos. There, perched in a brass frame was a picture of Andrew, smiling into the camera.

“Oh! YES!!”

Sara visibly relaxed, and looked so relieved. As I held her in my arms, her crying stopped; she began breathing normally and went back to bed without further fuss. Her upside down little world was now righted.

At last, we made it to the arrival area, and there he was, scanning the crowd. When he spotted us and waved, the girls whooped and hollered running through the crowd pushing and shoving till we all collided into one huge hug.

Such joy!

Speaking of joy, did you know that our physical body needs joy to be healthy? Brain science has now determined that the predominant way we experience joy is through our eyes. When someone, even a baby, smiles at us, the right side of our brain lights up. These neurotransmitters send dopamine that increases feelings of pleasure and motivation; serotonin which improves mood and creates a sense of well-being as well as endorphins which reduce pain and can create a sense of euphoria.

When my sister moved from Vancouver to Chatham, she immediately noticed that more people not only made eye contact with each other but often smiled and nodded. She recently told me she’s made more friends here in 4 years than in the 30 years living in the big city.

“Our human brain was designed to look for and run on joy.” says Jim Wilder in “The Other Half of Church”. If you suffer a loss of any kind, you’ll have a greater ability to stay emotionally healthy if your joy-tank is full. It’s not just an emotion but a “supra-emotion,” able to co-exist with pain or suffering.

I recently read about a time near the end of his life when Jesus was being harassed and barely escaped being stoned. Talk about stress! So he decided to cross over the Jordan river to the place where John had baptized him three years earlier. My guess is that he needed to be in the place where he remembered his Father smiling down on him, saying, “This is my beloved Son in whom I am well-pleased.” He needed his tank filled. Without joy, he could not face the cross.

Whether you’re a person of faith or not, I hope you see God and/or others smiling at you. Why?

The warmth and enthusiasm someone expresses when they see you foster a deeper emotional connection. You feel more secure in your relationships, and this connection can help you feel more open to growth and change. I’d do anything for my dear friend, Kathy. Why? Every time she sees me, she takes both my hands, and with a big grin exclaims, “Look at YOU!” or “So good to see you!”

Will you be that joy-giver today? Texting happy face emojis are fine, but they’re no substitute for an eyeball to eyeball full on smile!